Liesel and Jojo dropped by today, bless them. I love it that despite my numerous failings my gorgeous girls still love me. They brought some presents, mostly of the edible kind, helped me clean up my place, and played cards. I taught them poker at an early age so they robbed me of every match stick in the flat. They stayed a good few hours and we chatted at length, mostly about current things because of our painful past, but sometimes laughing together over happier times; like the time little Jojo, only 5 at the time, scratched drawings in the pavement with a stone and then decided that Daddy's new car could do with a nice smiley face on the side panel. Hmmm ... not sure that is such a happy memory.
I was sad to see them go, and cling to the memories of their laughter, touch and smell. They mean the world to me, those two, and to this day cannot fathom how I could ever walk out on them. But I did, and that regret will go with me to my deathbed, along with all the others I bear in the depths of my tired old heart.
The apartment is very empty tonight but I decided to lay off the wine for a change.
